lauantai 23. syyskuuta 2017

The Art Of Letting Go

Letting go about habits, things or people can be extremely challenging. And we all know that.
Or some of us know that, because I also know that there is people out there who just wave their hand and say "just let it go" and forget the issue.

I hope it would be as easy for me too.
But most of the time it isn't, and lately, I have been having a lot of discussions with my friend about this. What it makes so hard to let go of the habits, things and people even though you rationally can give 25,000 reasons it to be a better option just to move on than dwell in that habit, thing or person? I have a couple of theories.

First of them being scared. The thing with familiar things, people, and habits are that they are, well familiar. When you haven't experienced a lot in life in some certain area, it is very easy to convince yourself that the upcoming thing is very scary and that it might be worse than your actual situation is.
This applies to everything in life; in a bad relationship, in a shitty place to live, in bad job place, whatever. That is why you see so many "do not settle" posts in Instagram & internet in general. Those people have been gone roads and seen that every move they make when they are unhappy with their life situation has moved into something better. That same happened to me as well.
Of course, I do not say, that every cut that I made in my life made me perfectly happy. Because I tend to get sad very often. But oh dear Lord how sad I would be if I didn't make those cuts in my life previously.

The other reason why it is so hard for me to let go issues is more doing with the emotional bond I have over habits, things, and people. In fact, I can easily live without a habit, thing or a person in my life, because well, you know me. I can do anything. And so can you by the way.

But it is much heavier to let go the idea of that habit, thing or a person. For instance, when you love someone from the bottom of your heart you can not cut the emotion away just by deciding to move on. Like yes, your body moves on. But your soul does not do it so easily. You don't fall in love with people for nothing. You fall in love with their charasteristics, values and the things you share with that person. You fall in love the trust you built together. Ofcourse you can be with someone, with plenty of other reasons, but I am not interested of that.
And when they break your trust toward them, it leaves you to wonder if all of the love was balderdash and in fact, you were just in love with the idea of you loving them, than the actual person.
Because without all that being drugged feeling which you get from being in love, you see things more clearly. You see them, but you don't want to admit them because that is what humans do.
We still believe in Love.

The idea of something is what keeps us to be attached to things. The idea of quitting smoking, for instance, can be terrifying because what else will you do now before you go to bed? or during your lunch break? or when you get angry? Oh dear, I will tell you what you will do.
You will build new habits.
Just like you build new relationships.

Again quitting smoking is not so hard because you want to suck on that smelly (in my opinion they smell pretty dope, to be honest :-D unpopular opinion, I know) thing, but the idea of quitting. It feels like losing a friend. Cigarettes listen your worries. Cigarettes make you feel good. Cigarettes are always there for you, right? They are not there for you man. The idea of they being there for you is.

If I had one superpower in my life, it would be definitely being invisible.
But if that one was taken then I would definitely take the art of letting go.
I am sometimes the most dwelling person on earth. I would like to let go punch of habits, ideas, and people who my souls keep holding onto. I am a smart person, and I can easily see one million reasons why  there is no sense for me to hold on those things, habits, and people.
Sometimes I just would like to say to myself that God Damn woman just move on.
& often I say, and it carries me till sunlight goes down.

Then I might speak about it with the people who are dear to me.
And more me sharing things, I like people understanding me.
Sometimes the shit I put people through because of me is incredible, and I still wonder how the hell they are still here.
Maybe they like my honesty.
Or maybe they just accept the fact that my Achille's heel is just holding on something in my life.

I am a person who get crushes very easily.
It is very easy for me to be fascinated about things, habits and people.
Because first, I am very adaptable person, and second I like to see beauty in everything.
Most of the time I just think you have to put the object in a right angle to the light to be able to see it's true beauty.
But making me fall in love in habits, things and people is much more complicated.

And to be honest, I am still not sure what love is.
Is it falling in love with someone in matter of days and then getting betrayed by them and still being fascinated to their charisma and manipulative acting?
Or is it finding someone who has absolutely pure and kind heart and staying with them so long that the actual crush evolves into unconditional love?

I am not sure, but one thing I am sure about.
Before I can explore that I need to master the art of letting go.


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